Sometimes I just hate everything...

I should learn to stay away from political news. Lately, it just irritates the fuck out of me. I'm sick to death of hearing about media whore Sarah Palin, shit talking Rush Limbaugh, douchebag Glenn Beck, and asshat Bill O'Reilly. These fools just spew venom, hate, and so many lies; yet are allowed to continue unabated, without the slightest bit of control. FOX News is an agent of the Devil, I'm sure of it!

I really wish politicians would focus on the important issues facing this country...both Democrats and Republicans need to drop this bi-partisan charade of finger-pointing and blaming everyone except themselves. Warmonger Bush was allowed to go for eight fucking years without one peep of opposition...or if there was any opposition, the media didn't pay attention to them. Now, we have Teabaggers consisting of nothing but fat, lazy, clueless idiots who will blindly follow some dickhead like sheep. Why can't people think for themselves???

I'm sick to death of the political pandering by the Religious Right working so tirelessly to erode the Rights of their fellow Americans simply because these people do not fit the social standard of "normal". I'm talking about GLBT Americans. People like to spout how great this country is, how free we are, and how we are a beacon of light in an otherwise dark forest of evil. FUCK THAT. America is not so great when gays and lesbians are treated like second class citizens, where laws are created to prevent gays and lesbians from legally declaring their love for one another, where the rights of gays and lesbians are continuously trampled in the name of God. Groups like Focus on the Family and the Family Research Council are evil and must be stopped. Their reason for attacking (and yes, they are ATTACKING gays and lesbians) is homosexuals are "unnatural", "immoral", and they ride on the same tired old slogan "If they can't reproduce, then they must recruit". Yeah, right...cuz everyone knows we get a free toaster oven for every "recruit" we bring into Gayness. Why are these people so obsessed with homosexuals??? Science tells us that the most homophobic people are indeed homosexuals themselves. Something tells me that if James Dobson (founder of Focus on the Family) got pounded up the ass then maybe that perpetual STICK shoved up there might be dislodged.

These so-called "Christian" groups need to focus on the TRUE meaning of Christ...love, compassion, and empathy for thy fellow neighbor. As such, these groups are NOT Christian in any way, shape of form...they are tax havens, money shelters, and HATE GROUPS. Any group that works tirelessly to bring about the downfall of another group is full of nothing but hate, scorn, and they should be ashamed. But, unfortunately, the blind sheeple voters are so misguided and fall for scare tactics established by these "Christian" groups. It sickens me. It's disgusting, and it makes me sorry to be an American. When thinly veiled bigoted laws such as "Amendment 2" and "Proposition 8" pass is so called "progressive" states such as Florida and California, then it really shows just how far we still have to go as a nation. When special interest politicians focus more on passing laws to ensure only "family friendly" films are made in Florida instead of solving the real problems, then we're doomed to implode from within.

So, no...America is NOT the greatest country in the world. We the US can get over it's Puritanical roots and realize that ALL are indeed created equal, then we will be great. Right now, we are viewed as uptight, ultra-conservative, hypocritical bigots run by the Bible thumpers...the truth hurts.

The Far Right - NOT For the People...

Senator Jim Bunning (R-KY) is everything that is wrong with the Republican Party; rich, old, White, and male. Thus, it's no surprise Bunning keeps using the Filibuster to stop unemployment benefits for Americans...some even in his OWN home state. Bunning's rationale for hurting Americans: “We cannot keep adding to the debt,” Mr. Bunning said Monday. “It’s over $14 trillion and going up fast.”

Really, Mr. Bunning? Where was your "fiscal conservatism" during the 8 years the Warmonger GW Bush dragged us into TWO costly wars, borrowed billions from China, and extended tax cuts to the top 1% of millionaires? Where were your concerns when it became evident that there were NO weapons of mass destruction, yet Bush demanded MORE money to fight his oil war? Finally, where were you when Bush handed out expensive defense contracts to his cronies at Halliburton without even a bid???

Dickheads like Bunning do not care about the American people. They are AGAINST making the USA a better place to live. He'd rather we go into further debt by staying in unwinnable wars. I thought Conservatives were "Pro-Life", but I was wrong...Conservatives such as Bunning are NOT Pro-Life. If they were, they'd be demanding we end this stupid "War on Terror" where 6,000 Americans have lost their life fighting a war for OIL. They'd be demanding that we STOP borrowing from China. Finally, they would demand helping the American PEOPLE better their way of life, instead of running them thru the hot coals simply because they can't find a job...A job that was OUTSOURCED by the Conservative Presidency to India.

I'm mad as hell. However, people like Bunning don't fucking care. After all, HE still has a job, HE is still getting paid, and HE is still a douchebag Asshat who has lost touch with his constituents. Then again, this is his last term as a Senator...guess he better fuck up the lives of more people before he leaves.

Why must the majority of Americans be held hostage by the outdated principals of the least populated states in this country? Why do we have to care about what some idiot from Kentucky or Utah says? Why are we even listening to these backwoods hicks??? Florida is not the best state in the Union...hell, we're even being held hostage by the likes of "Focus on the Family" feeling they need to stick their nose in the personal lives of consenting adults; pushing their sad, archaic agenda on the voting ballot...but at least in Florida, we have a healthy opposition giving these clowns a run for their money. I'm not sure that I can say the same about Kentucky and Utah...sigh...

All I have to say is...I TOLD YOU SO!

15 years ago, the NFL was looking to place a third team in Florida. The league courted both Orlando and Jacksonville, but they were REALLY courting Orlando...Jacksonville was a secondary choice. As it stood, the illustrious (note: Sarcasm) then mayor of Orlando, Glenda Hood(rat) and then Orange County Commissioner, Linda Stewart, balked at the NFL. Orlando would have to improve the Citrus Bowl or completely build a new stadium. At the time, Glenda/Linda were too wrapped up in expanding the behemoth Orange County Convention Center and were too far in bed with Disney, Universal, et al in expanding tourism in Orlando. They were so short-sighted on the NFL, they refused to use tourist money to lure a professional football team to Orlando. They were happy with Orlando being a one team town. 15 years ago, the Magic were the hottest ticket in town. They were winning games, they made it to the championships, life was rosy for the Magic. Thus, with all the negativity and bemoaning the two frigid bitches did to the NFL, the league naturally chose Jacksonville. Orlando's loss was Jax's gain.

Jacksonville actually had civic leaders that could look beyond the rose-tinted glasses of tourism. They pooled together business leaders, community support, and government support to build a world-class stadium. The NFL noticed and awarded the expansion team to Jacksonville. Thus, the Jacksonville Jaguars were born.

Now, 15 years later, THIS article comes out: http://www.news4jax.com/sports/21158046/detail.html - JAGUARS COULD PLAY GAMES IN ORLANDO. To sum up, the Jags aren't performing so well in their hometown and the owner, doing as all NFL owners do when their team isn't performing up to scratch, is now looking to Orlando to be their saving grace. All I have to say is...I TOLD YOU SO!!! I KNEW 15 years ago that placing a team in Jacksonville was a bad idea. Jacksonville is the smallest market in Florida. Orlando is the 2nd largest market, besides LA, to NOT have an NFL team. Many say the NFL wouldn't choose Orlando anyway because of the proximity of the Bucs in Tamps. Bullshit I say. If Northern California can host the 49er's and the Raiders, both teams literally 15 miles apart from each other, then the NFL can have a team in both Tampa and Orlando!

Mark my words, today's Orlando leaders know an opportunity when they see one...and the Jags might just be that opportunity. It would be nice to see the Jaguars move to the city which should have been their home in the first place!

Harry Potter & The Suckling Teet and Michael Bay is a Republican

I loved the new Harry Potter film! Unfortunately, I saw it in the ghetto ass West Oaks AMC and as a result, didn't fully enjoy my theater going experience and just solidifies why I DON'T go to the West Oaks AMC...I got to the theater early to get a good seat and just before the movie begins, in walks this woman with a (barely) one month old infant and a three year old. The theater wasn't crowded, but she decides to sit next to me and M anyway...sigh...to make matters worse, this annoying woman proceeds to pull out her large tit and nurse her infant in the movie theater! Jeezus help us!!! This went on for the first hour and a half until M grew tired of the sound of suckling baby (the infant was also crying most of the night). She turned to the woman and said, "Do you mind?!" The woman walked out of the theater shortly thereafter...good for M!

Moving on...I also saw "Transformers 2 - Revenge of the Fallen". First off, I love the Transformers. I watched every episode, had almost every toy, and even read the comic book adaptation! Thus, imagine my woe when I heard that Michael Bay was reviving the franchise. Michael Bay absolutely LOVES to ruin a good action flick. Take "Pearl Harbor" for example...'nuff said. Anyway, I gave the first one a shot and found it mildly enjoyable...the kid in me, tho, always skips thru the boring dialogue and plot developments and jumps right to the robots. Well...part 2, unfortunately, did NOT come with a remote control. The whole movie is one giant, 2 1/2 hour pile of crap, NOISE FEST. I won't waste your time giving a critique of the movie, as I'm sure you've already read other blogs regarding how BAD this movie is, but I'll confirm the rumors:

- Yes, Devestator (although not referred to as such in the film) is portrayed as having testicles...and there is the line; "I'm directly beneath the enemy's scrotum". Why? Is it for comedic relief? God knows the 50 minute action sequence in which the scrotum is seen needed SOME sort of relief for the audience...

- Yes, there are stereotypical "new" Ebonic speaking Autobots who admit that they cannot read. And to throw even more fuel to the racism fire, they refer to the Hispanic character as a "taco"...no joke!

- Bay's conservative propoganda borderlines on the absurd: from first-time pot smokers tackling random dudes, Optimus Prime yelling the Bushism "Let's Roll", to the tired portrayal of France as a land of mimes and bad escargo. Newsflash, Bay! Optimus always said "roll out!"...not that douchie "Let's roll" that was made-up to embolden a greaving nation! Sheesh!

- Yes, the movie is LONG and during the fight scenes, the viewer finds himself spending the majority his time trying to decipher which robot is who...it's all one big giant mass of metal! The final 50 mins in one giant fight sequence where all the landmarks of ancient Egypt are reduced to a pile of sand...it's almost like watching "Team America: World Police!"

Orlando vs. Tampa - Who's winning?

Top Image: Downtown Orlando - 1944
Bottom: Downtown Orl - 2009 (appx same vantage point)

Orlando - this just in...the City of Orlando is in negotiations with a "major" adult entertainment owner to finally allow full nudity at Orlando's tiddy barrs...until now, the nipps have to be covered with a "pasty" in order for the "Nude" dancing to be legal in the town that Mickey likes to think he built. Orlando is also planning a "red light district" in an effort to bring more "manly" conventions to town like the Home Builders show. I guess home builders can't go a week without lookin at titties bouncing up and down. Personally, I think Orlando should go the whole hog and allow ALL nude dancing...Men too (oh yes PLEASE!). All of this leads me to ask...are we becoming the next Tampa? Doubtful...Tampa has become envious of Orlando as of late for reasons I think I know...

• - Orlando's city population has exploded to over 285,000 residents (as of last estimate) and is now only 90K people behind Tampa's city pop.
• - The metro population of Orlando is now over 2.6million and is only 100k people behind Tampa metro.
• - Orlando has become the next "Miami" in terms of shopping, dining, and city life. Orlando has Louis Vuitton and Chanel boutiques, while Tampa is still languishing in "Express" and "Saks Fifth Ave" (god, Saks was SOOO 90's). Orlando has a Waldorf-Astoria and Ritz Carlton while Tampa has...a Hilton. Orlando's downtown is still open after midnight with crowds of people...even on a weeknight. Tampa's downtown closes at 5pm and Lord forbid one try to find anything to DO in Tampa that doesn't involve going to Hooters or a wet T-Shirt contest.
• - Orlando has fast become a hideout for celebrities...Windermere alone is like Beverly Hills east. They like it there because it's closed to the public...no one can get in without at least having $1million in their bank account.

Tampa has now become the red-headed stepchild of Florida...which suits Orlando just fine. After all, Orlando spent YEARS trying to diversify it's family friendly image. So what if Tampa has an NFL, MLB, and pro Hockey team. Last I heard...not one of those teams can win a game, much less draw more than 1500 fans. Orlando may be "small time" with only the Magic, but what it lacks in professional sports it makes up for in simply being PROFESSIONAL. Tampa can have their Fuckaneers...Orlando will take the Burnham Medical Research Center and UCF Med School any day. Thus, all those Hooter wings eating, Fuckaneers tailgating, southern heritage Rednecks in Tampa can at least get a good triple bypass in Orlando [evil grin]. Speaking of Rednecks...has anyone SEEN that huge Confederate flag flying over the junction of I-4 and I-75...in Tampa??? I rest my case...

Call me biased...I don't care...but I just don't like the city of Tampa. It's dirty, it smells, and it's got this sense of superiority that Miami deserves. Miami and Orlando are becoming joined at the hip...Tampa and Jacksonville are becoming Kissing Cousins. (don't get me started on a rant about Jacksonville). Miami and Orlando are "Little Havana" and "Little San Juan" respectively...Tampa and Jax are just little penises.

Orlando is becoming the next Miami...Tampa will always be Tampa, and that's a shame.

The Potter, The Harpy, and The Annoyance

Greetings, dear readers! Spring is almost upon us and an Hour has already been stolen from us. Thus, as we all adjust to longer days and shorter nights, the big news is still...alas...the Economy. Bailouts, handouts, and sell outs abound. Yet, the middle class is still forgotten as the rich get richer and poor get more welfare. Which brings me to people like the Octomom...first, she looks like the hybrid result of Neanderthals breeding with Cro-Magnon man...she's hideous looking. Second, how on EARTH is she allowed to have so many effing kids; a la "the Old Woman and the Shoe"...close your fucking legs, you wretch! It's enough to make me vomit. And now the bitch in heat is getting a larger house and free medical care...courtesy of the American Taxpayer. And here I can't even get assistance, because I "make too much"...I'm penalized for NOT breeding and contributing to the surplus population. If I had 8 kids, my tax return would be thru the roof, but since I'm NOT married and NOT a breeder...well, you know the rest. Thus, my annoyance with the American System...and don't get me started on trying to get married...that rant is a couple of posts back...

Moving on...driving to work today along I-4 past Universal Studios yeilds a good view of the under-construction "Hogwarts Castle". CLAP CLAP CLAP...HOORAY!!! I'm litterally busting a Knut (form of Wizarding currency) in anticipation awaiting the opening of "The Wizarding World of Harry Potter". I know this is premature, but I recently purchased 2 annual passes to Universal Orlando...M and I are going this weekend. I just KNOW I'm going to run into someone I know. It happens everytime I goto Universal. Maybe working there for 5 years of my youth has something to do with it...? I always swore that I would NEVER purchase a Universal ticket, but I haven't worked there in 10 years and I've gotten over being fired in 1998. Also, I want to ride the Mummy, the Simpsons, and yes...JAWS...just for old-time's sake and to see if I can still remember that script...EAT THIS. Doh!!!!!

Finally, if I get one more email clogging my Inbox from the Harpy telling us to "log onto our phones", I'm going to get up and throw my stapler into her cube. Get up off your lazy ass and tell the offending people to their face to log on! After all...that's what a Manager with BALLS would do...even if she is a woman. Christ In Heaven...the joys of working in a female dominated company...there is not one frakking male manager on my floor and all these lazy ass bitches expect the few guys around here to do all the lifting of their shit. Piss off you frigid old bitch! My job description does NOT include lugging your box of 100 coffee mugs to your new desk. Throw out that moldy shit to begin with! And, it will NOT help you if you're a young, hot tomale...cuz hot women do NOTHING for my dick-loving self! So nanny nanny boo boo!

Back to the grind...some old wench is standing over my shoulder reading this with a box in her hand...

We'll Miss You, Claudine!

I have to say a final word and pay respects to Claudine Hillesland, a co-worker of mine at HMH Publishing. Claudine is the nice lady in the below posting who always planned everyone's birthday and was always there with a helpful hand or a kind word. She passed away just last month, but we will never forget her. Claudine was one sweet lady who will be dearly missed! Rest In Peace!